A Year Older, Can't Say I'm All That Much Wiser

Sometimes I forget how old I am. It's like I just lose track of time. When people ask me how old I am, I have to pause for a second and think about it. I'm 23 now. And not that I think that is old, but it definitely reminds me of how I signed up to put much of my life on pause while I pursue my dreams. While some people my age are getting engaged, married, having children, buying homes, etc, I am still living off student loans and spend most of my time studying or taking a break from studying. In medicine, we tend to opt for "delayed gratification", putting in all of the hard work now in hopes that someday it will pay off and we will be living some sort of dream life. Well, I really hope life has something special in store for me later on.

You know what... Who am I kidding?! I love my life now! It's just different from other people's, that's all. I am so lucky to be where I'm at - so grateful for the opportunity I have before me. I love where I'm at.

Anyway, for my birthday I had a few friends over for a dessert potluck, and here are some pics!

Amurrrican Camping Trip Photos

I went with some friends to the Oregon coast for a 4th of July camping trip a few weeks ago, and here are some of my pictures from it.  I didn't really take many because I don't think my camera is a big fan of being outdoors in the elements, and I was just feeling particularly lazy (I mean I WAS on a camping trip).  I didn't get to take pictures of some of my favorite things because I am not that great with lighting yet (bioluminescence, milky way, etc).  Also, I will eventually get around to posting some pics of our slip n slide adventures at roomie's birthday party.   I'm gonna stop typing now and here are the pics:

Cold Days in July

 WARNING: This post is emo.   

     Here we are.  Halfway through Block 3, and a lot has changed.  The last time I blogged, I had just finished my wonderful vacation and was optimistic about starting my second year of medical school.  As far as school goes, things have been pretty good.  I like the classes this Block (psych, neurology, pharm, neuroanatomy, etc) a LOT better than that microbio, immunology crap in Block 2.  Also, there are no more bi-weekly quizzes putting a damper on my social life.  We have midterms next week, but one week of hardcore studying is so much better than giving up every other weekend!
    As far as the other aspects of my life, things have spun a little out of control.  I broke up with BF who is about to move across the country for law school because I couldn't handle being kept a secret to his family anymore.  I know, you must be thinking that since I initiated the break up that I shouldn't be upset or hurting at all.  This just isn't the case.  This is one of those shitty chapters in life where everything is perfect except that one little thing that messes everything up.  This is one of those times where you can't just ignore that one little thing that doesn't work, because it actually affects everything, whether you like it or not.  So here I am, back where I started: alone.  At least we are still remaining friends, so at least I won't have to lose my best friend too.  I think that is one of the only things keeping me afloat.  That, and the fact that I don't have time to be depressed, so instead I have decided to turn my depression into mania (haha you can tell I am taking psych right now).  I have been distracting myself with a lot more studying than usual so I don't have to deal with all of this - and I actually really have to study so it kinda works out.
     I know this is kinda gunner of me, but I am already starting to get nervous for boards.  I am worried it's gonna be just like the MCAT all over again (aka a disaster).  It's finally time for me to get serious about my future.
     On top of that, I have been a bad sister-daughter-cousin-grandaughter lately.  I have gotten so wrapped up in my med school life that I haven't really made much time to talk to or to see my family, even though they live so close.  I can't believe I have turned into one of those med students.  I never thought I would get to this point, at least not this early in my career.  I guess these are some of the sacrifices we as physicians in training have to make.  I hope it's worth it.

Eurotrip 2011

Two weeks is the perfect amount of time for a vacation, I think.  It's enough so that you have time to relax and see/do a lot, but not too long.  When we went to Italy/France, I had a great time, but at the end of the two weeks, I was ready to get home.

I will sum up our trip in a few bulletpoints (you know me... straight to the point):

• ate a LOT.  Pasta, fresh bread, croissants, cappuccinos, wine, macaroons, etc.  YUM
• saw a lot. Colosseum, Vatican, DJ Pauly D (lol), Florence, the David, Venice, Eiffel Tower, Mona Lisa

Oh also, my sister thinks I am weird for this, but I worked on my paparazzi photog skills. I just think people are so interesting so I like to take pictures of them... in a non-creepy way, I promise.  Anyway, here are some of my pictures from the trip, distilled down to my favorites out of 1200: