Back In OB/Gyn Land...

... And loving it!  I'm halfway through my Gyn Onc Sub-I (aka AI/Acting Internship), and I am so glad to be back with my people.  I realized it's been almost a year since I've done any OB/Gyn rotation, so I'm a little rusty on some stuff, but it's all coming back to me.  I never rotated through Gyn Onc as a third year, so a lot of the oncology material is new to me, but that's why I'm really glad I chose this particular Sub-I, because I'm learning a ton.

   I was a little surprised because this Sub-I is actually turning out to be harder than SICU was.  On SICU, the hours were long, but I really didn't have any meaningful responsibility.  And the team really didn't trust medical students, including 4th years, to do anything important.  On Gyn Onc, however, I am the intern's right-hand-woman.  And I absolutely LOVE it!  The team actually trusts me to do important things - I have much more responsibility, but it actually is really nice.  It's nice to actually feel like an integral part of the team, and nice to know that the work you're doing is actually meaningful and making a difference.  So, even though I'm working long hours and taking on a lot more responsibilities, I am really enjoying it.  I feel like these last two weeks have been a preview into intern year, and it's gonna be tough, but I'll get through it, especially if I'm close with the people I'll be working with.  And, just as I expected, I love the people I'm working with.  I'd absolutely love to stay here for residency.

   That said, it makes things a bit more stressful because I'm really trying to impress people.  I don't really think I've been at the top of my game at all times, only because I've been nervous.  Because I actually care what these people think of me, it makes me shy and more introverted than I normally would be.  But my goal for the remaining two weeks of the rotation is to be more confident on rounds and speak up a little more in general.

   As far as the subspecialty of Gyn Oncology, I loooove the patients.  A lot of them are these sweet, sweet old ladies that you just want to give a hug.  And some of them are characters, sassy in their older years, and you know I love characters.  And then there are the grumpy ones, but I even get a kick out of them too.  I mean, they have a right to be grumpy.  They've been through a lot of shit.

   So here goes.  I hope I rock the remaining two weeks of my most important Sub-I.  And two weeks from now, I'm gonna be on ED Ultrasound.  That rotation is super laid back, and you work very minimal hours with a very flexible schedule.  It's going to be AMAZING.  Though, I'll probably have to use that free time for many of the important things I've been putting off, like finishing my personal statement, getting caught up in my research project (I'm really far behind :/), residency applications, sorting out my letters of rec... Ugh it gives me heart burn to think about all of it.  I just haven't had time to work on that stuff. Literally.

Happy Medical Monday!

   Happy Medical Monday, y'all!  Last week BF and I drove to LA to take Step 2 CS.  It was actually pretty tough!  You see 12 standardized patients (actors pretending to have things wrong with them) in about 8 hours, which was exhausting.  Props to primary care docs who do it day in and day out, because it takes a lot out of you.  Anyway, I'm pretty sure we passed, especially considering U.S. med students have a 97% pass rate on the first time taking it.  It's nice to have that over with!  

We were lucky enough to visit some friends while in LA!

Gamma Phi friends!

J, my bestie!

This is Ollie

One of my old roommates and UCLA besties!

   Now I just need to sort out my personal statement.  I spent 6 hours working on it yesterday, and now I have my second draft, but it still needs a lot of work.  I'm meeting with some of my OB/Gyn advisors this morning, which I'm nervous about because what's left of my confidence doesn't need to be beaten down anymore, but hopefully they can point me in the right direction. 

And On To The Next One...

   I can't believe I made it through a month of SICU relatively unscathed.  It was actually enjoyable.  Yep, that's right.  I said it.  Enjoyable.  I think my second go at trauma surgery was far more bearable for several reasons.  One, I was working with a lot of really nice people.  I got lucky on this one.  Two, for some reason, everyone seems to treat you differently as a fourth year medical student.  It seems like they have more respect for you.  I don't know why, I mean, I'm the same person I was a few months ago.  Third, I got to see a lot of really interesting, sick patients and scrub in on some pretty amazing surgeries.  And I got to learn more about operating in general which will apply to OBGyn later, like learning the names of instruments, etc.  Lastly, and probably most importantly, I have a much thicker skin now as a fourth year medical student.  I am so much less sensitive to critical comments and take things a lot less personal than I used to.  Originally, I almost didn't pick SICU as a rotation, because I was scared and I knew it was gonna be tough.  I'm really glad I pushed myself though, because it was nice to prove to myself that I could do it.  And the hours were rough, but I made it.

   Now I am on a two week "vacation".  Well, really this first week I am taking Step 2 CS in LA, so that's not vacation.  But other than that, we'll be visiting friends in LA and going on our annual beach camping trip in Oregon, which I'm really looking forward to.  I'm really looking forward to getting Step 2 CS over with.  And unfortunately, it still needs a lot of work, but I actually have my first draft of my personal statement.  It's actually been a lot harder to write than I was expecting.  For some reason, I'm just really having trouble articulating my thoughts, and I am having trouble structuring it, which I need to do in order to base my entire writing process on.  So needless to say, I've been pretty busy lately.  But at least I've been productive.

   I've been pretty annoyed at myself ever since I got my Step 2 CK score back.  I didn't score nearly as high as I was expecting, and I don't know why.  It's not like I didn't feel comfortable going into it.  And I scored about 20 points higher on my practice test than on the actual one, so that was pretty disappointing.  Oh well, there's nothing I can do about it now.  But I'm having trouble letting go.

   The good news is that after my next rotation (Gyn Onc), I don't have all that much to worry about besides residency applications and interviews.  By then, I'll have taken all of my boards exams, finished my personal statement, asked for letters of recommendation, and will have finished all of my most important rotations.  Man, is it really already July?!

*  *  *

BF (as I'm typing this post prior to publishing it), "Oh, are you blogging?"

Me: "Yep!"

BF: "What are you blogging about? Your personal statement?"

Me: "YES... but also about other stuff."

BF: "Like Step 2?"

Me: "YES ... what else?"

BF:  "Finishing your first Acting Internship"

Me:  "Wtf, how do you know?! Do you even read my blog?"

BF: "No, but I read your mind..."

I'm Alive!

   I'm almost done with 3 out of 4 weeks of my SICU sub-I, and I'm alive!  I have been working 24 hour shifts every three days (which actually end up being more like 30 hour shifts with rounds and stuff), and 12 hour shifts on the days in between.  This all works out to be about 85 hours per week - and I'm exhausted!   I'm really enjoying it though, much more than I ever anticipated.  I've witnessed some pretty crazy stuff, but unfortunately, I have no energy to blog about it.  Maybe later.

 

Baby Z perfectly demonstrating how I feel these days

I Must Be A Masochist

   TGS2CKIO. (Thank goodness Step 2 CK is over).  The actual test was a bit harder than I anticipated, but if I score anywhere near my practice test score, I'll be happy.  Unlike Step 1, however, the 9 hours seemed to fly by.  At least it's over! And I am so glad BF and I got it out of the way, especially while all the material from third year was "fresh" in our minds.  Fingers crossed while I wait for my score!

   Since the test, our week off has been a whirlwind.  I jet-setted off to Atlanta for a special Medical Students For Choice conference, which was inspiration and re-charging as always.  I got to meet some  really incredible med students, some of which even have blogs too!  Check them out if you're interested in reading other medical-related blogs!

• Dr Coffee's Brain Banter
• Spelled Like Latte-Man

My last minute packing list, with an extra addition

   And while I was in ATL, I got to visit my sorority friend H, who works at the aquarium and gets to ride dolphins! Amazing.  She even took me to the aquarium and I got to see the spectacular dolphin show she performs in!

ATL

   When I got back from Atlanta, BF and I went wine-tasting in Napa with our moms, which was super fun.

   And Melvie learned how to swim!

  This week break went by way too fast, and we already start up again tomorrow.  My first acting internship (aka "AI" - a fourth year elective where you work your butt off) is the Surgical ICU.  I know, I know.  It's quite ironic that I chose to subject myself to this particularly brutal AI, especially considering what a tough time I had on my surgery rotation.  But my main goal is to learn how to take care of really sick patients, and I'm even hoping to get a letter of recommendation out of it, if all goes well.  I also think I'm in a much better place to handle it, now that I've built up a much thicker skin than when I started out third year.  The schedule is gonna be the roughest I've had to far - Q3, which means you work a 24-30 hour shift, then a 12 hours shift, then repeat.  Over and over and over.  For a month.  So, I'm pretty scared, but I'm hoping it will all be worth it in the end.  

So Close

   Tomorrow I take Step 2 CK.  I've been studying for a little over two weeks now, only taking two days "off" to be able to take school clinical exams.  Studying has been going okay, in fact, it's been really nice to set my own schedule.  I used to hate studying at home, but this time, I've really enjoyed it.  I wake up, take my time, don't even get dressed for the first half of the day, play with the puppy during study breaks.  BF and I took our practice exam last week, and it went fine, so I'm hoping it's a pretty accurate prediction of my score.  I think the only reason we were able to get away with studying such a short time, is because we just came off our Internal Medicine rotation, and we actually studied really hard during that rotation.  I'm feeling a bit anxious for the test tomorrow, but I am so excited to get it overwith, and I am incredibly glad that I don't have to study any longer (for now).  After tomorrow, our real vacation starts. A whole week and a half *gasp* of vacation, where we can just relax.  Well, there actually is a little "work" I need to do during that time (data entry for research, and working on another research project), but at least we'll be doing fun stuff in between.  

Was tired of studying one afternoon, so I got my crafting on, and made these uteri magnets for my friends

Flashbacks to Step 1 studying

Enjoying the view, or plotting their escape?

   Well, here goes nothing.  This first couple of months of fourth year are gonna be pretty stressful, as I really front-loaded my schedule, but I have a good feeling about this year.

Melvie Has a Girlfriend

   My lovely friend from college, J, was in town this last weekend.  So we decided to introduce our dogs, Melvie and Pretty (short for "The Prettiest Princess").  They instantly fell in love.  Well, more like Melvie was smitten with Pretty.  She was trying to play it cool.

J, Pretty, Me, and Melvie

Switch dogs!

Melvie is infatuated with Pretty

I was cracking up because Melvie kept running towards BF, who was taking the pictures

Melvie putting his arm around Pretty

Melvie and Pretty, star-crossed lovers