Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Cold Days in July

 WARNING: This post is emo.   

     Here we are.  Halfway through Block 3, and a lot has changed.  The last time I blogged, I had just finished my wonderful vacation and was optimistic about starting my second year of medical school.  As far as school goes, things have been pretty good.  I like the classes this Block (psych, neurology, pharm, neuroanatomy, etc) a LOT better than that microbio, immunology crap in Block 2.  Also, there are no more bi-weekly quizzes putting a damper on my social life.  We have midterms next week, but one week of hardcore studying is so much better than giving up every other weekend!
    As far as the other aspects of my life, things have spun a little out of control.  I broke up with BF who is about to move across the country for law school because I couldn't handle being kept a secret to his family anymore.  I know, you must be thinking that since I initiated the break up that I shouldn't be upset or hurting at all.  This just isn't the case.  This is one of those shitty chapters in life where everything is perfect except that one little thing that messes everything up.  This is one of those times where you can't just ignore that one little thing that doesn't work, because it actually affects everything, whether you like it or not.  So here I am, back where I started: alone.  At least we are still remaining friends, so at least I won't have to lose my best friend too.  I think that is one of the only things keeping me afloat.  That, and the fact that I don't have time to be depressed, so instead I have decided to turn my depression into mania (haha you can tell I am taking psych right now).  I have been distracting myself with a lot more studying than usual so I don't have to deal with all of this - and I actually really have to study so it kinda works out.
     I know this is kinda gunner of me, but I am already starting to get nervous for boards.  I am worried it's gonna be just like the MCAT all over again (aka a disaster).  It's finally time for me to get serious about my future.
     On top of that, I have been a bad sister-daughter-cousin-grandaughter lately.  I have gotten so wrapped up in my med school life that I haven't really made much time to talk to or to see my family, even though they live so close.  I can't believe I have turned into one of those med students.  I never thought I would get to this point, at least not this early in my career.  I guess these are some of the sacrifices we as physicians in training have to make.  I hope it's worth it.


  1. Having been through the breakup-while-in-med-school thing before (although I was on the receiving end of it), I can honestly say that channeling your emotions into studying is great! Getting good grades + keeping yourself distracted = a win-win situation :)

    I know someone who actually couples-matched with his girlfriend... then after they started residency together, she broke up with him because she was tired of keeping him a secret from his family. So at least you had the foresight to avoid potential problems down the road should things have gotten even more serious.

    Okay, I'm done with my essay... feel better, and enjoy second year! Don't stress about boards TOO much until winter break!

  2. Hey girl. It will be worth it if you want it to be. Life is full of crazy trade offs. As far as the boy goes, I know it's hard to think about right now, but there are so many men in the world who would absolutely LOVE to date you. LOVE. Smart, hot, and kind women aren't a dime a dozen. Take much care ABabe; you are always an A+ in my book.